GOING BEYOND, BIG DREAMS AND YOUR NEXT STEPS

By Connie Martindale, L.C.S.W. Psychotherapist (Retired)

 

INTRODUCTORY NOTE

This is our final installment. Here, we delve into the concept of “big dreams,” archetypal imagery, the importance of feelings, and how to integrate dream insights into daily life.

 

GOING BEYOND

As we’ve explored throughout this series, the psyche speaks in metaphors. The Greek prefix meta means “after” or “beyond,” implying something that transcends the literal. Our soul work invites us to step beyond surface reality into a dimension untethered by time and space. Although metaphors may vary across cultures, their presence is universal—woven deeply into the human experience.

 

Dreams frequently communicate through metaphor, requiring us to engage our intuition and imagination rather than strict logic. A compelling example of this can be found in Elizabeth Neeld’s book, A Sacred Primer, in which she recounts a life-changing dream following the sudden death of her young husband:

 

“In the dream, I was walking along a residential street. To my right was a lawn that sloped gently upward toward someone’s home. Near the road, I saw a plant that looked as if it had been pulled up and left there. When I picked it up, I saw that the plant had roots—and the roots were still alive! I became ecstatic, joyfully running along the road calling, ‘The plant can be planted again! The roots are alive! The roots are alive!’”

 

Neeld awoke with a sense of energy and hope she had not felt in months. The dream had presented her with a powerful metaphor: the plant’s living roots symbolized her ability to feel alive again, despite her loss.

 

Depression, often part of the grieving process, can dull the life force to an almost imperceptible degree. A psychic numbness sets in as a defense against the anguish of loss. In Neeld’s case, her dream revealed that healing was not only possible but already beginning. She later reflected: “From that moment on, I was back in the land of the living. The Divine had intervened. Healing had occurred.”

 

BIG DREAMS

In his book The Secret Life of Dreams, Robert Moss explores how dreams have played a profound role in cultures throughout history. Among the Iroquois peoples of North America, for instance, dreams were considered messages from both the spirits and the deeper self:

 

“The first business of the day in an Iroquois village was dream sharing, as dreams might contain guidance for the community as well as the individual. The Iroquois recognized that the spirits sometimes send ‘big dreams’—major revelations about the soul’s purpose and the world around them.”

 

Carl Jung described these emotionally charged, symbolic dreams as archetypal, meaning they tap into patterns of human experience shared across time and culture. He viewed archetypes as a bridge between the personal and the universal, allowing individuals to connect with both their own lives and the collective human story.

 

A Big Dream stands out because it carries heightened energy—its imagery lingers, its impact resonates deeply, and its meaning unfolds over time. Jung described this phenomenon in Man and His Symbols:

 

“We can perceive the specific energy of archetypes when we experience the peculiar fascination that accompanies them. They seem to hold a special spell.”

 

Consider the following Big Dream from a man named John, a mid-thirties therapy client seeking to understand his troubled relationships:

 

John is at a hotel in a resort area. He is trying to get back to his room but cannot remember the number. He arrives at a door marked A10 and enters. Inside, he finds a foyer with four doors. A striking woman emerges—she is dressed in white, with white hair and skin. She tells him, ‘I am caring for my father.’ John finds her kind and wants to see her again. He returns to the foyer, approaches her, and as he does, she suddenly grows to eight feet tall. He feels small, embarrassed, reduced, and alarmed.

 

For John, working with this dream revealed unconscious patterns in his romantic relationships. He had repeatedly pursued women who appeared fragile, casting himself as their savior. Beneath this “hero” role, however, was his own unacknowledged insecurity. The dream’s imagery—the woman in white growing to an intimidating size—reflected his unconscious fear of true emotional intimacy. Ultimately, he realized that he needed to focus not on rescuing others but on healing himself.

 

A WORD ABOUT FEELINGS

In Western culture, reason is often valued over feeling. We are rewarded for thinking clearly, but emotions—particularly vulnerability—are frequently dismissed or ignored. Yet feelings are essential guides to our inner lives. Without them, we lose our sense of self, our place in the world, and our connection to what matters most.

 

Engaging in dream work means engaging with feeling. When reviewing a dream, the most important question to ask is:

 

HOW DOES THIS DREAM MAKE ME FEEL?

Many people struggle with this because they’ve been conditioned to analyze rather than experience their emotions. Here’s a common exchange between a dream facilitator and a hesitant dreamer:

 

Facilitator: How does the cat in your dream make you feel?
Dreamer: I love cats.
Facilitator: That’s great, but how does this particular cat make you feel?
Dreamer: Well… I had a cat as a child that ran away.
Facilitator: That might be connected, but let’s focus on your feelings in the dream. Did the cat make you feel happy, worried, sad…?
Dreamer: Oh… actually, I felt anxious and uncomfortable.
Facilitator: Okay, that’s good.

 

It may seem simple, but distinguishing between thinking and feeling is a skill many people need to develop. As we explore our dreams, emotions must be given primary importance—not as an afterthought, but as the key to understanding the dream’s message.

 

CONCLUSION

It is my hope that this series has awakened your curiosity about dream work and that your life as a Spiritual Senior will feel enriched. As seniors, many of us seek meaning in the years we have left. We are aware that our past is longer than our future, and we want to make sense of our lives, our relationships, and ourselves. Opening to dreams can be a powerful way to navigate this phase of life with more clarity and depth. It is my hope that this series has awakened your curiosity.

 

In the reading section of Spiritual Seniors, you will find recommended books for deeper exploration into dream work, including “Inner Work,” by Robert Johnson; “Living with Borrowed Dust: Reflections on Life, Love, and Other Grievances” by James Hollis PhD; and “Dream Wise,” by Lisa Marchiano LCSW NCPsyA.

 

CLOSING REFLECTION

This completes our journey through Where the Soul Goes at Night: Awakening to the Sacred Nature of Dreams.

 

Throughout this series, we’ve seen how dreams offer emotional balance, guide us toward deep self-compassion, and even transform our lives with archetypal “big dreams.” As you continue your own dream work, honor your feelings, engage your imagination, and trust the process.

 

May your nightly journeys lead you to greater insight, healing, and wholeness.

 

⬇️⬇️ Join the conversation — share your thoughts below! ⬇️⬇️

 

Connie Martindale, L.C.S.W., Psychotherapist (Retired), brings over 30 years of experience in individual and couples therapy. She also facilitates a long-standing Dream Group that has been meeting for over two decades. Connie believes that sharing our dreams helps uncover their more profound messages and fosters a greater appreciation of our shared humanity. She says, “When we look within, we are more alike than different.”